“Coach, I don’t want to strike out!”

Now that youth baseball has restarted (with safety protocols) one of my favorite things as a coach is to help developing brains deal with performance uncertainty. The kids just don’t know how it’s going to go. None of us do.

So, I try to get them, including my 11-year-old Colin, pumped up for their at bat’s. I ask them, “how do you want this at-bat to go?” Most say, “coach, I don’t want to strike out.” Wrong answer! This just reinforces the fearful emotions of failing.

We need to be reminded that there are always 2 things: the way we’d like it to go or happen; and the way we don’t want it, or fear, it will go. Especially during a global pandemic, we all need to stop reinforcing what we don’t want. This is because negativity, or being in opposition, clashes with the law of attraction. For example, having a goal of getting out of debt will always keep you in debt. It must be about prosperity.

When you grasp that what you focus on you will get, you become incredibly careful of what you focus on. This is why Mother Teresa said, “I was once asked why I don’t participate in anti-war demonstrations. I said that I will never do that, but as soon as you have a pro-peace rally, I’ll be there.” She didn’t want to give her energy to opposing war. It must be about peace.

We also have to be careful of how we describe ourselves. Too often when we make sweeping generalizations about our lives, we make all of the negative things come true— whether we want to or not. It’s devastating when people say something like, “I’m a constant worrier,” since just making the statement reinforces it. It’s better to say, “I’m getting better every day giving my energy only to what I want to have happen.”

Another huge thing for the kids is their self-concept, which is the limiting factor in our performance. If you see yourself as a poor hitter, you’ll never allow yourself any level of success that’s not consistent with your self-concept. Guilt is feeling bad about what you did or didn’t do (I should have swung at that pitch!), but shame is a global statement about you as a person (I stink at hitting!). The best thing for these kids to do is visualize swinging with great mechanics, hitting the ball hard, and feeling good and pumped up about their at bat, whether it was caught or dropped in for a hit.

You may not be a baseball player, but how much time do spend thinking about what you do want or how you’d like things to be? How do you want the rest of 2020 to go? Imagine if you were to somehow able stop people and get an honest answer to the question, “What are you thinking about right now?” The most successful people are thinking about what they want and how they’re going to get it.

We’ve all heard the phrase, “Be careful what you wish for.” It’s more effective to say, “Be careful what you give your energy and attention to.” So, here’s the right answer: “Coach, I’m gonna bash this ball so hard they’ll be getting out of the way!”